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Title: Resolute
Author: gardnerhill
Form/Wordcount: 438
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes & John Watson
Rating: G
Warnings/Content:  None.
Summary: The word has several meanings.
Author’s Notes: For the Holmes Minor January 2017 prompt: Resolution. An expansion of a paragraph in this December 2016 offering.


“Resolution” is a peculiar word; as with so many members of the English vocabulary, it has a number of completely different definitions.

It took two kinds to remove the cocaine addiction from my blood.

The first one was in the vow I made a few days after that dreadful Christmas day when Watson had returned from his midday walk to find me slumped by the fire and nearly insensate from the drug. That had ended in him roaring at me that I would either quit myself of “that loathsome syringe” or I would have the pleasure of the run of all the rooms at 221b starting at the New Year. That day I learned that there was indeed one prospect that was more frightening and painful to contemplate than a life without the stimulation of cocaine. So three days before year’s end, I made a vow.

The next six months of that year are painful memories. The first two weeks were marked by bouts of sleepless nights, anxiety, a craving I could no longer feed; fever, sweats, rage – and hurling invective at the people who least deserved it. The long weeks of poor sleep, troubling dreams, and constant craving were followed by a descent into utter ennui that I thought would sink me.

Through it all Watson never deserted me, though I gave him a thousand reasons to do so. He met my cruel belittlement with cold obstinacy, my vitriol with vitriol of his own – and my rage with the boxing skills he had honed in the Army. “I shan’t apologise,” he said coolly when I glared at him from my unblackened eye in the bed where I had come back to my senses. “Now perhaps you’ll listen to reason. Some fool of an earl has lost his mother’s brooch and you will find it for him.” (I had been taking every case no matter how trivial, commonplace or uninteresting merely to have something else upon which to focus other than the drug.)

My gradual ascent from my lethargy and hopelessness did not truly begin until the middle of August. But food regained its savour, I slept deeply and dreamed pleasant dreams and awoke refreshed and alert, and I once more sought challenging cases. Watson said nothing, but I nearly basked in the glow of pleasure he emitted whenever he looked at the eloquent dust that gathered on my morocco case.

Watson credits my steadfastness and my refusal to turn away from my goal for the success of this venture. I maintain that it took two men to defeat this addiction, and that Watson's resolution matched my own.

Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
debriswoman
Jan. 22nd, 2017 01:28 pm (UTC)
Beautifully put:-)
gardnerhill
Jan. 22nd, 2017 09:35 pm (UTC)
Thanks. These two saps love each other so much.
okapi1895
Jan. 22nd, 2017 02:08 pm (UTC)
Aw. What a lovely testament to their bond and great use of the prompt. I like the image of the dust gathering on the case, especially.
gardnerhill
Jan. 22nd, 2017 09:36 pm (UTC)
Holmes doesn't have to say a word to Watson about how long he's gone without cocaine - dust is eloquent, as he himself taught his friend.
thesmallhobbit
Jan. 22nd, 2017 10:37 pm (UTC)
As so often, it's easier when assisted by someone who cares.
gardnerhill
Jan. 22nd, 2017 11:13 pm (UTC)
A solid support network is vital for conquering any addiction - more so when it's family.
tripleransom
Jan. 23rd, 2017 12:29 am (UTC)
Watson is Holmes's rock.
gardnerhill
Jan. 23rd, 2017 08:38 am (UTC)
That was Jeremy Brett's theory too - that without Watson Holmes would have doped himself to death.
scfrankles
Jan. 23rd, 2017 01:00 am (UTC)
Such a great opening and great ending ^__^ I also really liked “I shan’t apologise,” he said coolly when I glared at him from my unblackened eye in the bed where I had come back to my senses. “Now perhaps you’ll listen to reason. Some fool of an earl has lost his mother’s brooch and you will find it for him.” ^_^

A wonderful look at the sheer strength of their relationship.
gardnerhill
Jan. 23rd, 2017 08:39 am (UTC)
Thanks. I do like a pugnacious and unapologetic Watson - which Holmes needs once in a while!
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )